Kate Gosslin

O.K. Where do I start with this? Um Kate, just because you can wear a get up like this doesn't mean you should. I've seen photos of you jogging and I saw you on Dancing with the Stars (I can't believe I'm even admitting to watching that freak show) and your bod isn't bad.... But seriously, you need the rolling mirror which is my invention for a portable full length mirror I can roll around outside to show people what they really look like. The animal print blouse and satin shorts - what are you thinking? Did you forget to look in the mirror when you got dressed?

Those unfortunate little children of yours - those poor little Gosslings. I know you've got to pay for tuition and orthodontia and what not but does that give you license to exploit them by putting them on the tv? I would suggest you put a little aside for their analysts' couches. Methinks they'll be spending some quality time there.